Yes, I did just quote One Tree Hill.

"At this moment, there are six billion, four hundred seventy million, eight hundred eighteen thousand, six hundred seventy one people in the world. Some are running scared. Some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day. Others are just not facing the truth. Some are evil men, at war with good. And some are good, struggling with evil. Six billion people in the world, six billion souls, and sometimes..all you need is One."

19,490,297 people in New York. 2,318,200 people in Vancouver. That is a combined population of twenty one million, eight hundred and eight thousand, four hundred ninety seven people. Twenty one million souls. And evidently, all I need is you.

Chris, where did you go? I miss you.

I think I'm okay now. I think. Let's not jinx it.

I feel much better now. Even smiling and joking with the family again. Bought some cosmetics today, as part of an ending-get-over-you-therapy-session. And with that, I spent roughly $37 CND, a really gorgeous Anna Sui nail polish in 103, and a Clinique lipstick with SPF 15 in RSVPink (23). I really love the Anna Sui nail polish. And I also purchased a Body Shop lipstick a couple of days ago, I forgot the color, but I don't really like the texture, it is a little bit too rough. Review next post :). So back to the main topic, yes, I feel much better about you now. It doesn't hurt anymore when I think about you, and my stomach doesn't feel like it's going drop when I am reminded of you. Not even saying your name in my head hurts me as much as I thought it would. But honestly, I don't think I've ever fallen so hard for someone. I guess seeing you for 12-14 hours a day for 5 straight days didn't really help the i'm-not-going-to-get-attached philosophy. And you and your wonderful performance didn't help either. I'm going to applaud you for playing whatever you were attempting to portray, so well. You got me believing in everything. I applaud you.

If you know me, and you're wondering just how hard and fast I fell for him...well, it's not that hard to explain. Who have I liked that I crie d about? I think out of the many boys I've like, I've ever really cried for 2. One was back in elementary school, and one was well, the one at school with the pretty hair. And how long did it take for me to cry for them? Definitely not 5 days. But I did for this one. Well, 8 days, to be exact. Eight days. Do you understand how hard I fell, smack on my face, yet?

We didn't even begin. How come I feel broken?

Have you ever read New Moon? I did. When he left, she couldn't do anything. She moped, she sat, she did everything routinely but with no life. How come I'm doing the exact same thing? We didn't even start, this isn't the first time this has happened. But it feels like we've broken up.

I don't want to go out and see family. I just want to stay inside and mope. I don't want to be accompanied by family, I just want to be alone. I don't want to eat, I don't want to shop, I don't want to do anything but curl up in a ball and cry. I almost cried today on the bus, because everything reminded me of you. Even the guy standing in front of me in the line for the bus was wearing Abercrombie and Fitch jeans. Even standing in the MTR station, there was a map in front of that showed me where you lived. Even watching the rain. The sun. My sunglasses. My makeup. The shoes I wore that day. The dress I wore that day. A girl on the street wearing Hollister, or Aeropostale. Even shopping in The Body Shop. We talked about everything. So everything I see reminds me of you. Dinner. Rice. Tea.

What is happening to me? Why can't I get you out of my head. How come I want to cry any second now? I feel exactly like a girl who has just broken up with someone she loved. Except I never fell in love with you. I just fell for you, head first, faster than I've ever fallen. And you didn't catch me.

I need to get away from here. I need to be back in Vancouver. I need my friends.

He lives in the Big Apple.

I met a boy. He is a great boy. And I'm sure there was something, but I don't think it could ever work out. He stares at me, he locks eyes with me, he said I was pretty, and he didn't object to be crushing on me, he said he thinks about me, he remembers the outfits I've worn, he's good to his mom, he's good to his little sister. He's got everything I'm looking for. And a swimmer's body. We have everything in common, and he's cute as a button. But he lives in the Big Apple.

We live miles and miles away from each other. What are the chances that we both meet in a city that is halfway around the world?

I promised myself I wouldn't get attached. What am I thinking? This will never work out. Goodbye.